Double dippin

     2 open mics tonight, Helium and Sukis.

     I get to Helium and sign up around 6, though the show doesnt start till 8. So I walk to Goodwill and kill some time. Nothing cool to be found, though they had a ton of boxes of baseball cards.
     I got a 5 minute spot on the list at helium tonight, good times.

     Now Im at the classic Tuesday spot, Sukis. This is the room you come to work the crowd, try new shit, and eat shit.

Kenton Club

     Booked for a gig at the "World famous" Kenton Cafe last night. It was a metal show with me and another comic starting the show off.
     The club was your standard dive bar. Pool table, slot machines, and drunk metal heads rounding out the room. Small stage in the corner with good lighting and sound.
     Max goes first, and does well. all his jokes land, they're all quick and to the point and the crowd dug it. I go up next, start off strong. Getting nice long applause breaks in between my first couple jokes but start to lose the crowd when I tell my longer story jokes. they just didn't want to have to have to pay attention to anything longer than 20 secs at a time. Regardless, the night went well and the bands were great!

Helium - Dantes .....

     Tonight I went to Helium and had a blast. It was a great crowd, all the comics did well. I was #16, so I was up at about a hour into the show. About half the comics that went on tonight were people I had never seen before, and they all did pretty damn well.
    I went with an opener I knew worked, a new joke and wrapped up with a semi new "E.R. with a drunk girl" closer. Got a great response and headed of to Dantes with a smile.
    I get to Dantes and am put on last, which is usually a great spot, as the audience builds throughout the night. By the time I got on, it was pretty packed, but the audience wasn't having any of it. Oh, it was brutal. Seriously a disaster.  I started of with a "classic" cancer bit, which got nothing....seriously, not a damn thing. The audience was just talking over me, not giving a fuck. Its funny because I had just done the same set that killed at Helium only an 90 minutes before....comedy can be a fickle bitch.
    So in conclusion, another great night!

Gypsy...

    Its been a long, fun week and tonight is no exception. Its a long list at Gypsy tonight so I kill some time next door singing karaoke. Rebel Yell is my go to and I belt it out hard.
   A bacholorette party walks in while Cody is doing a set, and since they are all drunk they start heckling. Cody is not having that shit and he launches into one girl hard, she can't take a joke and gets super pissed...its hilarious.
    Kyle decides to drop "n bombs" on stage and afterwards a few black dudes have some words with him... Nothing happens though.

Helium...

    I got the pleasure of hosting tonight at Helium Comedy Club for the first time. It was a great show with a special guest (Todd Glass) closing out the night.
    I opened up with a 15 minute set and the crowd seemed to dig it. My new pesticide joke fell flat though, so that was rough. But other than that, it felt great! The crowd was fun.
    Now I am sitting at Tonic Lounge for some open mic action....it never stops.

Boiler Room....

       Another wonderful Monday eve at the Boiler. I am hanging out with friend in the back of the room while I wait for my turn at the mic. Its a long list tonight, 26 comics, and I am right in the middle.
    I go up and tell a few new stories and they go over pretty well,  so I am pretty happy . Afterwards, I walk over to Dantes, grab a slice of pizza and sing "I want it that way" by Backstreet Boys because, well... I want it that way. And I killed, big thanks to Manny for going duet with me! Than man can sing.

Harveys....

    Finishing up the 7 show spread at Harveys, this was a great weekend for me. I hang out in the green room and chat with the other comedians while we wait for "go time" The manager walks i and asks if I am ready, damn right I am. My camera decided to take a dump so I cant record all my performances though. Damnit.
     The crowds were good to me, and with the brewfest going on, they were pretty rowdy, but they wanted to laugh.  I get lots of compliments after the shows from random people, which is always nice.
  

Harveys...

    Good times tonight at Harveys Comedy Club. I get the pleasure of opening up for some talented comics. The crowd is there to laugh, and I take advantage.
     I open up with the usual "welcome to Harveys" intro and the launch into my kids with cancer bit...they eat it up. The only flat spots are my Backstreet Boys bit and I will scratch that off tomorrows set. But all in all, a great set.
     Lots of handshakes and compliments after the show from people and I always dig that.

Brody...

   I'm feeling off today. I haven't eaten anything, and I feel all fuzzy. I take a seat in the back of the room and keep to myself,  because I'm not feeling good.
    I am the third to last comic tonight. So I have about an hour and 15 minutes till I take the stage and go over some jokes. I collect my thoughts and deliver a fun set.
    All the regulars do well, Tom (the owner) gives a fun opener and hands the mic off to Mr. Toscani, who hosts for the eve.
    I love the couch at Brody.

Brody....

    This is one of my fave rooms for comedy. Its a small intimate theater, made for trying new material out.  The crowd is usually small, though tonight it is full...of hot chicks none the less.
    I am the first comic to hit the stage tonight, and I have a pretty decent set. I actually stuck around and watched everyone go up. Theres some good new material out there, just needs to get dialed in.
    Nothing too amazing to write about, but a good night. Also, the weather was beautiful. It was the absolute perfect temperature tonight.

Gypsy....

    Tonight was awesome. Good crowd, good energy, good times. The room is packed, people are standing. New jokes worked great, cant wait to try them again.

Dantes....

     This eve is starting off pretty normal. I hit up the arcade and play some pinball while I wait for the mic to start. I walk into Dantes around 9 and survey the room. A few comics are sitting at a table in the back and wave me over.
     I am beat, I sit down and put my head down and take a quick break from the chaos that is Dantes. Looks like it will be a fun night, people start trickling through the door and the place slowly fills up. The entire bar is cast under dim, red lighting. Giving the room a warm, hellish tone.
     This is one of my fave rooms, because the people that come here are rough around the edges and you can say whatever you want...I dig it.

Gypsy...

    Another Thursday night at Gypsy. A smaller crowd than last week, but they are here to laugh, so I am digging it. A couple of people from out of town are also here telling jokes, they are hit and miss. One guy is brand new and he digs a hole so deep that I feel bad for the guy following him. Luckily, it's one of the better Portland comics and he has a great set. 10 solid minutes that bring the audience right back.
     I am number 4 on the list tonight. I go up and break out some new shit I thought of today and it goes over great. My hating kids but wanting to be a father bit gets a solid laugh and even an applause break, so I am jazzed. Follow it up with a newer classic, which goes well. I didn't even get through half of my set list though, as my opener/new joke took like 4 minutes to try out. Oh well I will just have to save my Captain Planet material for next time.
     This was certainly a great night to lift my spirits, not that they were down before, but it's feels great to walk away with an applause any night. I wish everyone could experience this, because its as good a feeling as any drug I have tried...though I haven't tried heroin...

Night off...

     I have a bittersweet relationship with nights off. On one hand, it is nice to be able to lay around and relax for the eve. On the other hand, I get bored pretty easily and enjoy doing comedy more than anything else. I will try and be productive with some writing, but right now I am watching Star Trek (tng of course) Afterwards I will prob play some counter-strike and get my ass kicked by a bunch of 11 year olds from Germany.
     God damn Germans.

The "cafe"

     Down those winding stairs I stroll, into the warm, haze filled room. They have been busy in the last couple of months since I had been here. They have a nice raised stage now, with a drum set..I am tempted to play, but do not want to disturb the chill, low key atmosphere that is prevalent throughout the room. They also have a pool table, air hockey table, and shuffleboard to keep you occupied as well. A nice bar area with some great "medibles" and everyone is always happy. No drama or loud, alcohol induced stupidity, always peaceful and serene.
     I arrive a few minutes late, but as usual with most comedy events, it never starts on time. I still have 30 minutes to think and get a set in order. I'll start off with something topical that the crowd can relate to, and stay away from any of the more abrasive material. Though most of the people in the audience seem less than interested in the comedy show going on, they are polite and keep their table talk to a minimum.
    Everyone does their time and gets a smattering of applause with a few laughs mixed in. This is not a room you come to "kill" instead, this is a room you come to be productive in. I feel good about how a new bit went over and may use it in my Harveys set coming up.
    I have eaten shit in this room many times before, but still I come back begging for more. Its a fun way to spend a Saturday evening, right?
   

Gypsy...

Another night, another dive bar. No stage tonight, just a small, dimly lit room with a sparse, but attentive audience. They give a few "meh" laughs as the comics cycle through the show. Most are there to sing karaoke in the room to the right side of the bar. Luckily, the two rooms are separated, but you still get the echoes of your least fave 80s hits being murdered by total strangers, bleeding through the walls. Though sometimes you get a gem. Kudos to the gentleman singing Prince tonight, you were on point. To the left is a wall made up of various lottery machines, flashing and bathing the room in colorful light, fighting for your attention.
    Hopefully, if it goes well, all attention will be on you when you take the floor. Though, sometimes it doesn't all go to plan, and you get the pleasure of bombing in front of your friends and fellow comics. There is a definite joy taken by the group when they watch a fellow comic eating shit. Not in a negative way, it's the exciting "how will he handle it?" anticipation that gets us smiling. Will he just power through his set? Will he give up and get off stage? Will he win them back....?
   
      ....Tonight, I did not win them back, I ate shit for 10 minutes.


      And then I played pinball.