The Fixin' To....

     Got booked to do a little bar in St. Johns called The Fixin' To. Its a small bar with a nice corner lot and stage setup, unfortunately we are set to perform in the smaller side lot...oh well. The show is fantastic, like 40 people show up and they are super loud, I dig it.
     There was a beautiful blonde girl checking me out all night but left before I said anything to her. I am a coward.

Bar of Gods

   Taking a night off and watching some friends tell jokes this evening. A solid lineup at a classic dark bar on Hawthorne. A small PA system setup in front of a giant window facing the street. My type of setting, getting to watch people walk by in the background gives it a nice touch.
     30 minutes to show time and only one comedian is here. The host is getting antsy, but everything will fall into place... And it does, all the comics arrive 5 minutes to showtime just like professionals, and I got asked by the host to do a guest spot .. hell yeah let's do this.
     By the time the show started the room was full. At least 50 people packed in here, great times. I used my choking bit as the closer trying to switch it up. It worked amazing, it will be my closer at Harveys.
    Good night off

Helium week...

    I was fortunate enough to get booked for a weekend at Helium. This was an amazing weekend for me, in an always packed room. I love this club, the small stage down low makes it feel like you're in a coliseum. LED stage lighting is super bright, I'm sure my skin is getting some sort of damage while I'm telling jokes but fuck it right? If I'm not getting damaged from artificial light, it would be real light. Damn gingers.
   The headliner was a Portland native name Auggie Smith and he brought the ruckus. This man knows how to do comedy, and Its inspiring to watch him. He is also a very dirty comic, which makes me feel a little less bad for opening up with a choke fucking bit.

Tardis Room....

     A friend of mine recently hit me up on Facebook, asking me to fill in for a dropout. Apparently, it is me, another comedian, and a magician! I'm going into this with fairly low expectations, as I have not seen any promotion for the show.
    I get to the room in North Portland, there are two people sitting inside, and a fairly nice stage setup taking up a good chunk of the main room. I got there about an hour early and got some food while I waited for show time. I'm waiting around and no one is coming into this place, I'm not worried its just pretty funny. As showtime grows closer my friend and the other comedian show up. So its just me and him and the sound guy J who is ready to go.
     The couple that was in the main room left as soon as I announced that there was going to be a show. I don't blame them, this was a very quickly throwing together event. We did the show anyway, fuck it. There was literally not one person in the room watching us perform when we started. I took this stage in did about 12 minutes of just bs'ing with my friend back and forth no real reason to even try and tell jokes in this scenario. A couple of parents walk in with their daughter who was apparently 15. And of course at that moment I was in the middle of some really dirty sex story that involves role play and choking...so they left.
     I brought three people in and then walked them within 2 minutes.That's a record for me.

Malones....

I got to headline a gig tonight out in Beaverton tonight. The stage was set at a little bar 20 minutes outside of Portland. Typical sports bar with Nickelback playing on the jukebox and SportsCenter top 10 highlights on the TVs. Great room overall, there were probably 50 or 60 people, all of them wanting to hear stories.

I had my friend Cody open up for me and he did great as usual. Then I went up and closed out the show with about 35 minutes. Not so much crowd work this time, the crowd wasn't really saying anything at all. I kinda just ran through some of my older bits, and did work on some new stuff.

I really need to get some merch.