House show and Slide Inn

I had 2 shows the other night. One was a basement show at a friend's house and the other was at the slide in. I've done the slide in before and I dig that room but the house so it was new for me.
   First the show was the house so. It was fantastic, not a big crowd because it was a smaller room but they were very responsive and it was a really good show for everybody. They had cookies and drinks and stuff and the lineup was fantastic. Good Times.
   Later that night I was at the slide in. This is a room I've done before and I usually have a great time. Tonight though was strange because there was 6 people in the audience. Literally 6 people. That place is usually packed out standing room only but tonight for some reason only 6 people came out. It was hard to get any laughs, and I basically stood on stage for 15 minutes talking to nobody. It was pretty classic honestly. Still a fun time regardless.

Helium

Tonight is the Tuesday night open mic so I, as usual head of liver to helium for a spot. Small crowd, unresponsive. I go up and have the fun idea to record my set first person from my front pocket. Footage was horrible, luckily so was set.
   I guess it's a lose+lose=win scenario.

Tacoma Comedy Club

   Last night I was fortunate enough to perform at Tacoma Comedy Club. It was a great show with 5 Comics hosted by my friend Todd. It was a Sunday night and the crowd was somewhat sparse but they were pretty cool. Honestly I wasn't getting many laughs and I kind of talked a lot of shit to them but I felt like everything went pretty well. The other comics on the show or laughing a lot but it's hard to tell if they were laughing at the jokes or laughing at the audience not laughing. That's the way it goes

Helium

    Back to reality in time for another Open Mic at Helium Comedy Club. As usual there's a hundred comics signed up but luckily for me I work there so I'm guaranteed a spot. I go up tonight with a bunch of random ideas, nothing really put together. I didn't want to do any actual material since I just came off a great weekend so I talked about how colored lights are better than white lights on Christmas and some other christmas-related bullshit. It went okay.

Helium Weekend

    This weekend I have the honor of featuring at Helium Comedy Club for the first time in my comedy career! I've been working for this for 5+ years and now it's happening, feels good to see my effort not going to waste.
   Friday night I hosted the first 2 shows and they were fantastic. Seriously great. The feature and headliner were super awesome and the crowd was electric!×
   Saturday I finally got to the promised land of featuring and god damn it was fun. 1st set was a blast, the crowd liked everything in had mostly and I felt very natural on that stage. 2nd set was fucking fire! Best 30 mins of my life. Crowd was electric and I left that stage with a boom. God damn I am grateful.
   Sunday night had a show at 7:30 and there was a very small audience of maybe 30 people but they were in it from start to finish...damn this is fun!
  

Dirty Dozen Roast Battle

Last night I got the hosts biannual roast battle showcase and wow what a show it was! A nice big audience showed up even though it was game 7 of the World Series and all the comics brought their A-game. I'm start to finish it was a damn good show. I ironed out a lot of the kinks from the first one and this time it was much better! Everyone did fantastic and I left the club feeling really good about myself.

Liquid Laughs

   This past weekend I had the pleasure of featuring at Club Liquid Laughs in Boise. Its a great club that I have been to before and I really looked forward to it. I enjoy the 8 hour drive as well, but theres always a lingering "will my car make it?" floating around in the back of my head. Luckily, my car made in there and back! averaged 40mpg too!
   Thursday show was a blast, the crowd was really good and I had a great time. Derek Sheen was headlining and he killed as well. That was a great way to start the weekend.
   Fri we had 2 shows and they were both good too! Nothing too eventful, we both had great times on both sets and ended up watching shitty horror movies till 3 am.
   Saturday was amazing, I really wish I had recorded my early set because it was crazy. Im not one to talk up my sets but that early show...man. The audience was with me from start to finish and I had to talk over their laughter, it was too much. I left the stage with a huge applause and enjoyed that buzz leading me into the final show. The late show was also amazing, both shows on Sat stood out. If every show had that level of energy...thats what Im working toward.
  Boise is a legit little city. Everyone in friendly and they have an awesome arcade called Grinkers that hass 100+ old machines and root beer floats are only a buck! Fucking A.

2 great shows

Tonight I got two shows scheduled and I am excited for both of them. First off is my good friend Jason's art show / comedy show. The man is a genius and he makes random artwork on every medium, tonight he is going to talk about his paper cuts and have a small comedy show at a cafe. 
  I get to the cafe about 30 minutes ahead of the show and there's a few people in there, some cheese and grapes and various snacks. Jason's paper cuts are displayed on the wall and they all look really good. By the time the show starts the place is full and Jason starts the show talking about his art and being awesome. I went up eventually and I had a great time just talking to the crowd, riffing a lot, and making stuff up on the fly. It felt very natural and I left that show Happy.
   Afterwards I'm scheduled to be on the great comic strip show at Funhouse Lounge. This is a showcase where Comics do material and take off their clothes hence, comic strip. I go up 2nd and I get completely naked in front of a packed Funhouse Lounge. You don't have to take all your clothes off but I decided why not? There's a hundred plus people in the room they might as well see my dick. It felt great too, most of my set was riffing talking about myself being naked and just interacting with the audience. They were throwing money on stage like I was a stripper and I made 23 bucks! This was a really really good show and it rounded out my night.
   Two great shows in one night, I wish I could do this every day of the week

The Comedy Store

Tonight I flew out to Los Angeles to try and get on The Comedy Store open mic. I'm only in town for less than 24 hours and The Comedy Store is the only reason I'm here. Luckily for me I made the cut and I get to perform in the potluck.
     It's a pretty small crowd but it's also early. I go up around 7:30 and have a great time. The MC seem to enjoy me and after my set I sit back down and watch the rest of the show.
   After the open mic I went up to the belly room and watched the kill Tony podcast live, that was hilarious. And I peeked my head into the main room and watched a few people on a bringer showcase. I really wish I could have done time at the bringer show case but again I don't live in LA and don't have anyone to bring unfortunately.         
      Hopefully next time I come to La I can get a little more time on stage here.

New Deal

Last night was the last New Deal show of the year and wow it was a hell of a way to end the season. The lineup was stacked, the crowd was packed in there standing room only and everyone was ready to laugh.
   I went up first as a host for Jason Traeger who is the real host. We decided 10 minutes before the show to host the host and did a little skit about it at the top. It went over well and I only did about 3 minutes out front before I brought the real host Jason out to the stage.
   Everyone had a great set, no slow parts at all. The crowd was super happy at the end of the show and everybody left satisfied. Afterwards I went home got super high took a giant dump and went to bed

Dirty Dozen

  Holy shit, it's finally time for another Dirty Dozen. It's been like 5 months and I have been waiting for this for a while. The lineup is amazing, 12 top-notch comedians at the best club in town.
   I get to the club about an hour early and bring some gifts! I got some leftover liquor from a Distillery I work at and brought it to the staff, they dug it. Even though I was there an hour early there were already people waiting for the show. 10 minutes to showtime and there was a line going down the stairs. Felt good to see that the momentum we had built up was not slowing down.
   I went off and started the show with a story. And erotic Story featuring Grumpy Cat. A story I had written a couple years ago and only told once, I wanted to share it again and I'm glad I did. It went over pretty well and the night was really great for everyone involved. My girlfriend showed up and got to watch me again but in front of an actual audience.
  I got over 60 insults text it to me throughout the show. My idea of giving out my phone number and asking the audience to text me mean things to win prizes really gets the crowd involved.
   Anyways, night went well, fun to be back at Helium, look forward to my next Big Show

Seven Nightclub in Bend

Tonight I'm in Bend at the Seven Nightclub. A nice little bar on the main street that has a dark side room for shows...feels kind of like the old Tonic Lounge. The stage is nice with Christmas lights in the background and along the ceiling. There's also a giant light up "7" on the opposite wall above the dj booth.
   Drive to the show is nice and I bring a feature named Brandon. Solid younger comic, I always like to being a feature that's never done comedy in Bend before and Brandon is ready. He also brings the entire crowd. His family all showed up and that was it.  He did about 30 minutes in front of his family and had fun. I went up and did about 45 and most of the crowd walked out during. They were only there to see Brandon oh well. The few that stuck around were awesome and hung out till the end.
  The drive back was calm and uneventful, I just got high as shit and enjoyed night time mountain driving.

Renton Civic Theater

Last night I had a feature gig at the Renton Civic Theater in Renton (obviously) Washington. Beautiful old theater right on main street, holds 3-400 people....13 showed up. Seriously 13, and 1 if them was my girlfriend. The place was empty but the crowd was great for how small they were. I felt bad for my gf for driving 7 hours with me for that show but she enjoyed herself. All in all, still a win.

Shotskis Pizza

The night I drove down to Salem to do a set at shotski's Pizza Pub. I went with pretty low expectations but was surprise when I got there because this Pizza Pub has a huge stage and is really set up nice for live shows. There's a few other Comics that are out of town on the show as well, and it's always nice to meet new people.
   I went up at the end of the night and in about 20-25 minutes to a pretty good crowd. There was maybe 30 years people there and they were friendly and laughing a lot. I lost myself a few times on stage because I was so high but I still felt pretty okay about the set.
   Afterwards I drove home with all my windows down listening to some FM 84 and zoning out. It was a good drive.

Earthquake Hurricane

   The other night I was invited to beyond the earthquake hurricane show. This is a great show I've done it many times before, and as usual it's a nice full audience.
   I get there about 20 minutes early and shoot the shit with the hosts. The show starts about 15 minutes late which is normal in comedy. The audience is full, but they are tight. Nobody's getting any big laughs for the entire show including me. I have some good hits but I was also rambling a lot and doing a lot of new stuff which is not that good yet.
   It was still a great show and a great way to spend a Wednesday night.

Tall Tales at Helium

The other night I got to be on my favorite storytelling showcase at Helium Comedy Club, called tall tales. The room was pretty packed out and I was a little nervous going up there with new material but it all went over pretty well. I talked about family vacations and how I grew up there Jamestown and how terrible all that colonial-era early American history bullshit was. I ranted about Santa Claus being paedophiles as well. The crowd was into it and I felt great after I got off stage. And I got invited to the next one at the end of the month!

Helium Vs The Wheel

Tonight I am on a show at Helium Comedy Club called vs the wheel hosted by David and Adam. It's a great show that's been going on a long time and is now getting its own monthly showcases at Helium. Show premise is simple enough, you do 5 to 10 minutes of prepared material then you have to spin a wheel and improv off of the wheel suggestions.
   I go up first and have a pretty decent 5 minutes of opening material then get my first spin. The wheel was against me tonight. Both of my spins where it's not good. For my first spin I got characters. Which means I had to do jokes in character. I do not do characters. At all. Ever. So for my first character it was just really loud confident man which translated to me screaming at the audience like an asshole. For my second character it was super Southern hick guy which actually was easy enough for me and I told my swastika tattoo joke.
  My Second Spin was even worse. One liners. I am a Storyteller. That's what I do. So I was pretty screwed. I opened up my one-liners set with my cocaine off a stranger's dick joke because that's my quickest. And it hit really really hard. It was really good I kind of wish I had recorded it, way better audience reaction to that joke and that joke ever would deserve. Then I followed it up with my quicker jokes and it only got worse but I still ended well.
   Overall it was actually a very fun night, it just sucks when the wheel is against you. But that's the great thing about the wheel, it keeps you on your toes and is just a fun Improv brain exercise. I look forward to the next one

Double J Saloon

   A couple nights ago I had the pleasure of headlining a little saloon in Redmond Oregon called Double J Saloon. It's a small bar located on a quaint little strip of classic town americana. Old brick hotels, artisan al white people stores...the usual.
   The bar has a small front room and a large performance space in the back. No stage but cool lighting and a couch in the front row. The place is empty when I get there, but by the time the show starts it's packed. 50 ish people fill the room and the show starts right on time. The crowd is warm throughout the entire show, and I do about 40 minutes.
   The best part about a show like that is the nice 3 hour drive there and back, I like quiet drives alone.
  

Alberta Street Pub

Last night I got to headline a fun show at the Alberta Street Pub. It's a great weekly showcase and I'm happy to be on it. The start was a little rocky, the audience took a while to warm up to the comedians but by the time I hit the stage they were all good. I opened up with some new material about the Olympics end just kind of freestyled for a while. Then I went into some older material and just picked and chose random things I wanted to say, it all worked out pretty well. Had a good closer and walked out of there pretty happy.

Bridgetown Day 4

Tonight is the last of Bridgetown and what a way to go! I have 2 shows. The first show is in a small tent outside and is hosted by a good friend that I started comedy with named preacher. Show goes well, preacher is a great host and keeps the energy going even though there's a small audience.
  The second show is inside the bossanova ballroom and is called dirty 30. 30 Comics do 3 minutes of dirty material. I go up in the second half and have an amazing set. Crowd loves me, that was a great way to end my Bridgetown weekend.

Bridgetown Day 3

Tonight is the third day of the Bridgetown Comedy Festival and I have a great show I get the host with David Huntsberger. That guy is hilarious. It's at the analog theater and there's a nice full crowd of 40-ish people for the entire show. They laughed from start to finish, this was a great Friday early show to really get me in gear for the weekend!

Bridgetown Day 2

    Day 2 of Bridgetown and I'm still pretty sick. Tonight I'm at my father's place, a small bar right off MLK Avenue. It's got a nice Diner feel to it and there's probably 15 people in the audience for the show. Regardless they are a good little audience and some of the comics I work with on this show are truly amazing.
    Afterwards I just went home because I still feel sick.

Bridgetown Day 1

Bridgetown Comedy Festival is upon us and I'm excited. Unfortunately I'm also kind of sick but nonetheless The Show Must Go On. My First show is at siren theater, and I get there about 30 minutes early. I'm not even supposed to be on the show I got thrown out last minute as they had a out. It's a great show, I get to work with some old friends and there's about 40 people in the audience and they're all very into the comedy. This is a great Wednesday warm-up for the rest of the week.

Slide Inn

Last night I got to headline a show at the slide in. It's a small bar that is usually packed for the show. Tonight is no exception. There's probably around 40 to 50 people sitting down when the show starts.
   Everybody goes up and has pretty good sets and then I closed it out. It felt pretty standard, nothing too eventful. One woman asked me if I was registered to vote within the first two minutes of me starting my set because I was doing some new register to vote material and it kind of threw me off but nonetheless everything went over pretty okay. I pulled out some old stuff some new stuff and just kind of had a random fun time.

Casino Run

This week I got to do to casinos back-to-back. I've never been to either one so it's pretty exciting to perform in two new venues.
   First up is the Tulalip Casino. It is a huge casino with a very Grand Ambiance, really nice looking inside. The show room is nice and holds probably about 300 people, although only 30 show up. The crowd is sparse and they are not laughing at much at all. Basically this set was terrible, I never connected with the audience and I left feeling pretty shitty. I ended up getting bad reviews from the house manager, but fortunately the booker didn't really care and I'm sure I'll end up being back soon.
   Up next was the Muckleshoot Casino. This is also a very huge casino inside with a million slot machines. This set went way better than the first one, I walked offstage feeling pretty good about myself. The sound guy was cool and the audience was small but with it. Afterwards me and done and I'm getting accosted by a random patron telling us that he was going through withdrawals or some shit. He was really weird. Me and Don then left immediately and drove home.

Helium and Brody

   Tonight is a typical Tuesday so I head out to Helium Comedy Club to work on some new material. It's a pretty small crowd because there's a basketball game on but they're all really nice and laughing. I go up and do some new material and then closed on a rant about Genesis. It went pretty damn well.
  Afterwards I headed to Brody to try the same material again, what could go wrong? I ate shit pretty horribly. I love it.

Beaverton Show

    Tonight I'm out at a small bar built into a strip mall and Beaverton. I don't know anything about the show going into it, and I show up about 30 minutes ahead of schedule. It's a small one-room bar, TVs line one side of the wall. When I get there it is empty in the post is there is well. By the time the show starts there's about 20 people in there and they are all on board for comedy.
    I am the only person on the show. I knew I was the headliner, but I assumed there were more comics. Nope. Just me. They have an open mic as well and they let a couple of the open mic comics go up first to warm up the crowd, doesn't go well. I've never seen any of these open micers before, but hopefully I will later on in Portland. They are obviously new and living in Beaverton, this is their only outlet.
   I go up and do about 50 minutes. The crowd was on board from start to finish, no complaints. I did some new stuff some old stuff, some clean stuff and some dirty stuff. Really just went through the entire Spectrum. Afterwards I got paid, 45 bucks. All tip money.
   I will take it.

Helium

    This week I got to work at Helium! And it was a good one. There was a one-night-only Wednesday Showcase with Shane Mauss headlining, and Thursday through Saturday was Colin Kane.
    The Wednesday showcase was great, I got to do a longer than usual said because it was only a two-man show. So I did about 18, I meant to do 20 but I messed up and I guess we got a joke. Oh well, the crowd dug it and Shane went up there afterwards and killed for 90 minutes.
    The Thursday through Saturday shows were also a lot of fun hosting with Colin. Guy is really nice off stage but when he is performing he is a totally different character. Really aggressive and insulting to the crowd, but they loved it, he is built as an audience and they are there to get fucked with. Super chill off stage again, he was really friendly while we were in The Green Room.
   The feature was a really cool dude named Gary Anderson who I look forward to seeing you again sometime. He's out of San Francisco and he's really laid-back and chill. We would just hang out and get high between shows.
  I wish I had brought my camera with me Friday night, both of my sex felt like fire. It got me feeling so good I brought my camera with me on Saturday but both those crowds were much less enthusiastic than the Friday show. Not bad by any means but Friday would have made a good ten-minute clean TV tape.

Kiggins

Friday night and I am booked at the Kiggin's theater in Vancouver for the first time. It's a wonderful theater that holds probably 800 + people. Really beautiful venue. Unfortunately only about 15 people show up and it is one of the roughest sets I've had in awhile. Everybody bombs.
   I almost called it off too because I ate some THC candies at noon and by 7 o'clock I was still so messed up I struggled to drive to Vancouver. Definitely gotta make sure to have an entire day free next time I eat those cookies. When I got to the theater I just sat in the back row with my sunglasses on and my eyes closed until they told me it was my turn. I looked like some strung-out jazz musician.

Earthquake hurricane

Wednesday night and I am booked at earthquake hurricane. A great show that I'm happy to be on. I go up in the middle of the list this time, then have a pretty fun set. There's a few drop in guests as usual, some from LA, and they do great. It's a nice full room as usual and after the show I walk home pretty happy.

Liquid Laughs Boise

    This weekend is my first time as a club feature and I am gonna be in Boise! Kind of a big stepping stone in my career, I'm very happy. It's a Thurs through Sunday gig and I am working with Bryan Cook! Cool ass dude.
   I leave Thursday morning, pack up some clothes and board games and head out to Boise. In the back of my head I'm a little worried about my car not making it there because, it's a 1988 Civic that I had to change the head gasket myself on so there's no guarantees. But luckily for me it makes it there without a problem, in fact they got 43 miles per gallon! Only cost me like 20 bucks to get to Boise from Portland.
     I get to the comedy condo, amazing. They put you up real nice and a spot downtown that's about a 10-minute walk from The Comedy Club. Once I parked my car I didn't have to start it again until I left Monday morning. Really comfortable beds, Maybe I should invest in a nice bed because I sleep like a rock.
    Thursday night the 1st show goes pretty well in front of a very small audience. Seriously, about 12 people showed up but they were all on board and really good sports. So all in all though show felt great. The club itself is a smaller venue located downtown, probably holds about 150 people. After the show me and Bryan went to another comedy showcase a few blocks away and got some guest sets in. After that we hung out for a while at a bar across the street, I got some weed from a few people that so I'm at the show and liked me so that was nice. Eventually at about 2 in the morning we headed back to the condo but first we had to stop at a strip club it was about the clothes. Pretty nice club inside, but apparently they don't take off they're closed. No boobs allowed. I don't really care, cuz I didn't want to go to the club in the first place but Bryan was not a fan. Good Friday pay a girl to give me a lap dance and I was like f*** this, and left. Then I had to come back cuz I didn't know the code to the condo door haha. Pretty eventful Thursday...also I got real bad diarrhea and ended up staying up throughout the night. When I finally went to bed I stayed in bed till about 5 p.m.
   Friday there was one show. Room was about half-full, and I had a pretty good set. Afterwards they had a tough night where a bunch of Gothic dressed people showed up and standing around the edge of the room awkwardly not dancing. Reminded me of middle school dances. I ended up going to some random stranger's house and getting high with them, they were cool. 
   Saturday was at 2 show tonight. Both shows were about half full and the audience wasn't laughing that much of anyone. It was kind of weird. I did my set got off stage and watched the headliner do his material. Not too much laughter that night, but still a fun time. Afterwards me and Brian stayed up till about 4 in the morning thinking of the most horrifically offensive jokes. I laughed harder than I've ever laughed that night.
   Sunday was the last show and it went pretty well even though there was maybe eight people in the audience. Very small audience. But at least they were laughing. Afterwards me and Brian went back to the condo and watched some shitty TV shows. Good way to end the weekend.
   Monday I drove back to Portland, pretty uneventful drive. Very glad my car made it there and back. When I got home I went right to sleep, it's strange how 8 hours of driving will just take it out of you

Helium

This weekend I am hosting Tuesday and Wednesday for a special event with Bert Kreischer. I get asked to host last minute and have to cancel earthquake hurricane, but working helium is first priority.
   Tuesday show was great, nice sizeable crowd and they were on board from start to finish. I went up with some new stuff, new introduction, a lot of new tags, and it went well.
   Wednesday night was a banker. Probably one of the best sets I've had on that stage thus year. Seriously, the crowd was packed and they were into it. I tweaked my set from Tuesday, added some jokes and took some out, and really had a solid 15 minutes from start to finish. It felt great getting off that stage, I wish I'd recorded that on video cuz that would have been my submission tape for everything. I did get it on audio, and when I got home I listen to myself again and was still very happy with the outcome.

Paradox

Tonight I'm on a little show at the hell or high water bar in North Portland called Paradox. Hosted by my friend Alex Rios, I look forward to it. It's a small metal themed bar with a stage, and I've performed here before on different showcases.
   I get to the show quarter to 9 and the show starts at about 9:30, at first no one is in the bar but it fills up a little bit by the time the show starts, there's probably 15 people there at show time. Really special guest tonight, Ron Lynch dropped in and did a set at the end! This guy is so hilarious, just being able to watch him do 10 minutes in a bar with a very light crowd and still kill it is inspiring.
    Shows you that anything is possible

Boiler Room Klingon

   Earlier today I found a officially licensed Star Trek the Next Generation Klingon headpiece kit, and of course I bought it. I decided I would use it tonight at the open mic and do some Klingon comedy as Ja'Kob, from the house of Cristo. My girlfriend also wanted to go watch Comedy, but she did not know I had bought the Klingon headpiece so... she got a surprise.
    I got the Boiler Room at about 9 o'clock, and signed up at the end, after about 40 minutes I went up second to last and did my set in front of 10 people. It didn't do as bad as I thought it was actually kind of refreshing to try a character for a change.

NWCC/VICE Show

    Today was just going to be a boring Saturday when I woke up with no real plans and then I got a message from a friend who needed a fill in at a show at the Northwest Cannabis Cafe. I gladly accepted, it was a headlining spot so that's awesome that my Saturday went from nothing to headlining a great show. Even better it was being filmed by Vice TV.
    Being this show was at a Cannabis Cafe I was noticeably high before I got on stage from smoking and eating various marijuanas beforehand. There was a big crew of people there filming the sets from the comics and I felt like I did pretty well. Hopefully some of my material makes it on the episode, but if not it was still a great show. Everyone was on board from start to finish and the crowd was super happy to have us.
    I like short notice shows like this, Outta nothing something great. Life is always surprising.

Dirty Dozen

    Tonight I am really excited because I got to put together the lineup for this edition of The Dirty Dozen and it is a doozy. Everyone on the lineup is a killer, and are perfect for this show. I get to the club about an hour before the show starts and there's already people waiting around. By the time I took the stage there were 200+ in the room easily, it was almost sold out.
   I had a good set. Trying to be unbiased as possible but it's hard haha. I started off with an old quick bit about Locks for Love Foundation, and then did some new stuff. Some of my new stuff really hit well too, my senior citizen porn material... As I type this I realize how classy I am. Hit hard.
    I closed the set well and then introduced the comics. The crowd reacted great to every person that got on stage. I also got a lot of text messages and some of them were brutal. Everybody was a winner tonight.

Harveys

   This weekend I got to perform at Harveys for the first time since my 1 year ban. I get to work with a cool head liner that I have opened for before and the feature is also a local guy.
    The Thursday show was a small crowd but they were into comedy. Both Friday shows were sold out and felt great. The 5 o'clock Saturday show was pretty light but it was still a great crowd and the next two Saturday shows were phenomenal. The sunday show though, that was the worst one by far. Probably about 40 people in the audience and it felt pretty silent while I was trying to be a host. That was a battle. But seeing as that was the last of 7 shows, the night ended with a pretty good wave of relief haha.

Dirty Dozen

 

   My day started off good. My car that was stolen 3 weeks ago was found, in perfect condition only a mile away from my home. All that was stolen was the change in the ashtray. Good shit. That night was a Dirty Dozen Showcase...
    The show was really good. Amazing packed crown, all the comics did well. I did a very old joke I havent told in 3+ years and refreshed it and made it actually good! I did some more new material about how all drugs taste bad and closed on a meh note. Tried doing my getting flashed material and it just didnt click so I called an audible and told one more quick one liner that also didnt really stick. The show was great regardless, I am always nit picking every detail so of course I am never satisfied.
   Afterwards I ate some Potato Champion and drove home to play Counter Strike and get high. My life is pretty good.

Helium

   Its a new year and Im off to Helium for the Tues open mic as usual. My car was stolen a few days ago so I have to bus it out there but no matter, its not too bad. A lot of people are recording submission tapes tonight so I go up early on the list. I have some new material about imaginary friends and my stolen car I wanna run through. The crowd likes most of it, I finish my set talking about my yellow pants....real important stuff.

Dirty Dozen

It's 2016, a brand new year and time for a brand new Dirty Dozen. The lineup tonight is made up of a lot of new faces and a lot of out of towners, I'm excited for the show. I arrived at the club about an hour ahead of time and talk shop with the managers and wait for people to show up. Not a large audience this time unfortunately, I'm kind of bummed that only 80 ish people showed up. But fortunately most of them were paying customers, not many comps.
   I go up and do about 10 minutes up front to one of the crowd up and it goes pretty well, did some new material and then gave out my phone number and ask the audience to text me insults for prizes. I got a couple of good ones and a lot of really lame insults but all in all the crowd liked it. The show went smoothly, all the comics did great and the audience was on board from start to finish. Afterwards I shot the shit with some people in the crowd and went home and wrote some more..

Good times.